Top 10 Places / Times Not to Get a Woody

10. With your wife, visiting her sister.
9. Golfing with the guys
8. With your wife, and accidentally run into your ex-girlfriend.
7. Showering with the guys after a basketball game.
6. Visiting a friend in the slammer.
5. While being pulled over for a traffic citation.
4. Shaking hands with your pastor/priest after church.
3. In front of your child's 3rd grade class, looking at the teacher at show and tell time.
2. Standing on the subway with a bunch of nuns watching you.

And the number one time never to get a woody is
1. When your best friend, on a guys night out, asks you, "Hey what do you want to do tonight?"